Tips for the NASCAR Novice

I never claim to be a NASCAR aficionado. Hell, I just used the word aficionado so fitting in at NASCAR a process. (Clearly, I am still working on it).

But, with a little effort, some costuming and a set of ear plugs, fitting into NASCAR can be fun, easy and well worth the effort.

So here are some tips to ease you into a fine time at NASCAR:

Tailgating is Mandatory
Unlike football game day, where you can take or leave the tailgate, tailgating at NASCAR is mandatory. Now, just ‘cause you don’t have an RV doesn’t mean you should shy away from the fun.

Basic burgers and hotdogs are still favorite fare but be sure to bring the right beer in the right cooler. Stick with the basics: Busch, Milwaukee’s Best, or if you want to get fancy, Coors Light, Miller Lite or Bud Lite. Don’t embarrass yourself with any Coronas or Sam Adams. That’s just not cool.

Ear Plugs are a MUST
NASCAR is loud. It is so loud that it shakes your body and brain for the inside out. You will need ear plugs. Now, you might think its wussy to wear them. Well, I say there is nothing manly about going deaf. So, wear them!!!

Bring You Own TP.
Now, I am mostly talking to the ladies out there. I will break it to you now: With all that Busch beer, you will need to use a port-a-potty. Get over it. But, as an insurance policy, bring your own TP and some Purel for your hands.

No Bottles, No Cans, but Bring In Plastic, Man!
Ok, a cool thing about NASCAR is that you can bring in a tiny, soft cooler of refreshments. Of course, bottles and cans are out for obvious reasons. But, bring in your Miller plastic bottles and enjoy.

Flip-Flop with Care
My first NASCAR event, I blew out a flip-flop. Trust me, the grounds around NASCAR events are no Margarita-ville. Wear closed shoes.

Now if you want to push for the flip flops, get some platform ones at Walmart. They will lift you above the trash, glass and sludge and get you feet feeling OK.

Pick a Number, Pick a Name...But for God Sake, Pick Somebody
The best part of NASCAR is cheering on your driver. Pick a favorite and go with it. For me, once Dale Jr. endorsed KFC, I knew he was perfect for little ole me!

Be sure to stop by the drivers’ merchandise trucks located closer to the venue. It is the widest variety of souvenirs and I was surprised to see how reasonably priced the items were. For instance, a Dale Jr. visor is $12 and a slutty, NASCAR tank top for girls is only $15.

NASCAR Fans are Your Friends.
Finally, although it is cliché, the best thing about NASCAR is the fans you will meet. They are kind, fun, and loyal to their sport. So, be social. Learn from the best. And, be sure to share your beer.